Day 4
After the torments of day 3 were over and I collapsed onto my mattress I was unable to get any sleep at all. I had just lay there awake all night crying and thinking about my situation, about how trapped I was. I had never felt more helpless and alone in my life, I doubted anyone ever had. Everyday of my sentence so far I had made some infraction of the rules and earned more days to my sentence. I was terrified that my torment might never end; I would be tortured here day after day until I finally died in misery and pain.
The pain I had endured the previous three days seemed to blur in my mind. I knew it had been absolutely unimaginable but it was so hard to wrap my mind around just how bad it had been. For several years I have been a long distance runner, marathons were my favorite. Anyway when you are in the middle of a marathon you say to yourself “Fuck this sucks why am I doing this.” But at the end of the race, when you cross that finish line, you are immediately thinking about your next race. This, I knew, was due to the fact that your mind can’t hold on to pain and your mind kind of smooths out the suffering. I imagined that the same thing was happening now.
As I lay awake on my sweat soaked mattress sobbing and lamenting my fate the door to my tiny dungeon opened once more.
“Good morning Ms. Thompson.” He said cordially as if we had just met at a diner for breakfast.
I had no response. I didn’t move at all I just looked at him with the tear-stained hollow eyes of the helpless and lost.
“Well, this is day four of…” he paused to consult his notes. “Ten days left. Your initial sentence was for eight days. On day one you earned two more days. Day two you earned another day and on day three you earned yet another day. You really should follow the rules or you might never get out of here.” He said as a faint smile appeared and just as quickly disappeared.
Oh my God ten days left! I would never survive. I was not sure I wanted to survive.
“Now that I have informed you of your remaining sentence I need you to acknowledge that you understand what I have just told you. As your jaw may be unusable, in this case a nod will be sufficient.”
I nodded slowly in acceptance of my terrible plight.
“Thank you Ms. Thompson. So now for your daily choice. Door number one, the unknown, or the same punishment as yesterday?”
I knew better than to take too long with my answer and I had all night to think about it, I really had no choice I had to choose the unknown. The idea of suffering the same way two days in a row was simply not possible. “Today might be easier”, I thought hopefully. But I knew better, who was I kidding it was going to be hell.
“Vee ubdowdn” I sobbed
“The unknown?”
“Eth” I nodded
“Alright Ms. Thompson. Today you will be bound and gagged as per usual but today you will be in a bit of a predicament as well. Let me explain. Electrocution will be added to your punishment today.” He said as I began to cry.
“You will need to stand up on your tiptoes to avoid being shocked. If you lower your heels too much you will receive a shock until you lift yourself up onto your toes again. Just so you’re forewarned, when you raise up onto your tiptoes again the level of the shock for the next time increases. You would do well to try and stay on your toes, so to speak, as long as you can.”
Fuck! Eight hours on tiptoes, it’s impossible. No please don’t do this…
“Pleeb don do this, pleeeebbbb…” I mumbled
“Times a wastin’ Ms. Thompson, we better get started.”
I can’t tell you how scared I was. Electrocution! I had no idea what that felt like I only knew that it was used to torture people and from what I had seen in the movies it hurt, really bad. I was trapped. I was soon going to be gagged severely and electrocuted for eight hours and I was helpless to do anything at all.
He had me stand up so he could apply the usual punishing gag, huge ballgag, tape wrapping, hood, harness and of course the thick collar. Soon I was once again heavily gagged.
“OK. Now for your bondage.”
The same reverse prayer type binding of my arms and the same pain ripped immediately into my shoulders and arms. I began moaning deeply into my gag.
“Please step onto this platform Ms. Thompson.” He said as he placed a small raised platform below me
Once I was standing on the platform he used small C-type clamps to fasten each of my big toes to the platform. Once the clamps were tightened I was unable to step off of the platform.
Next he fetched a pressure sensitive device. It was to be placed under my heels. The device consisted basically of two pressure buttons connected by a bar. If my heels pressed down to much on the bar I would receive a shock.
“I am now placing the shocking device under your heels. Please stand up on your tiptoes as high as you can Ms. Thompson.”
Terrified I was going to be shocked I began screaming in fear.
“The device is not active yet Ms. Thompson, please calm down.”
I stopped screaming but I was still terrified and very far from calm.
He placed the device under my heels and I could feel the cold copper bar on my heels.
“You can rest your weight on the bar if you would like we have not started yet and you will need all of your strength for the next eight hours.”
As I rested on the bar he adjusted the tension on my gag by pulling on the wench, which pulled my head and arms up to the ceiling. Now I was as per usual forced between pulling on my horribly bound arms and pulling on my cruel gag.
“Now please stand on you tiptoes again Ms. Thompson.” As I did he once again pulled the rope from my head and arms tighter.
“Now if you lower down onto the bar you will not only get a shock but your gag and arms will tighten as well. Now for the electrical leads. There are several points of attachment we can use. Today we will use two, your nipples and your clitoris.”
Oh no please you can’t. This is supposed to be a gag punishment this isn’t fair no please please you can’t do this. Oh God! Electricity into my clit and nipples… this can’t be happening, this has got to be one long nightmare, I gotta wake up… please let me wake up…
He then applied little clamps to each of my nipples. They were painful but not too painful. It seemed they were just tight enough to stay in place.
“I apologize Ms. Thompson but I will need to enlarge your clitoris a bit to apply this clamp.”
I had been naked since I had been forced to strip on my first day but this was the first time I felt I was being sexually abused. I had previously thought that it was odd that under the circumstances I had not been sexually abused. I guess this was the time. I was so humiliated and angry at the same time.
“Please don’t take offence Ms. Thompson, I am only doing this to get the proper bite for the clamp.” He said as he began to tease my clitoris and trying to sound professional at the same time.
It came a quite a shock to me that as he flicked and rubbed my clit I did get the beginnings of arousal, it was the only pleasure I had felt in three days of constant pain. But it was very short lived. Happy with the size of my clit he placed the clamp on my now engorged clit. The pain was intense and I winced and let out a tiny squeal.
While I adjusted to the fresh pain Mr. Carson hooked up all of the wire to the clamps and plugged them in to the control box. While he fiddled with the controls he explained what was about to happen to me. “I am adjusting the beginning shock level and the maximum shock levels. The machine has levels of intensity from one to one hundred. I am setting the starting level at twenty-five, painful for sure but not something you will enjoy. Punishment remember? The way the program works is, as long as your heels are on the bar you will receive a shock. Once you rise up off the bar the shock turns off. But, and this is a big but… once you raise up off the bar the level of shock rises one level so next time you rest on the bar the pain increases. So I would try your best to stay off the bar.”
This punishment seemed to me absolutely diabolical, what kind of sadistic fucks thought this kind of thing up? How was I going to stand it? There was no way I could stand on my tiptoes for eight hours. No way. I was sure to suffer electrocution on my most sensitive parts for a long time. How much would the shocks hurt? How much they increase? I was trembling with fear.
“You’re all ready for day four Ms. Thompson. See you in eight hours.” And he shut the door as the clock started.
Time Remaining: 7:56:34
I was in the usual pain, huge gag killing my jaw, arms in a twisted agony and now my calves were beginning to shake with the effort.
“Gotta stay off the bar…gotta stay off the bar…gotta stay off the bar…” I ran the mantra through my mind over and over as the burning in my calves increased with every passing second.
My whole body was now shaking with the effort. My calves were screaming for relief. I was now sweating freely. My eyes were slammed shut with concentration. “Gotta stay off the bar…” It was of course a losing battle but I was so scared of getting shocked I fought with everything I had.
Time Remaining: 7:50:09
I lost. My calves finally gave out and I came down on the pressure sensitive bar. Pain instantly ripped through my nipples and clit. I shot up off the bar with new found strength in my calves.
“Oh my God! That hurt so bad. That was only twenty-five?! Oh God what am I going to do” I thought as I began to cry.
As I stood there helplessly with my horrific and painful arm bondage I could feel the pain in my calves creeping back.
My “Gotta stay off the bar…” mantra began once again but this time with a new sense of desperation. My calves were now shaking violently with the strain. I knew it wouldn’t be long now.
Please no it hurts it hurts please please please I gotta st…
Right in mid plead my claves failed me. White searing pain tore into me. It seemed like the previous pain had doubled. I didn’t think it was possible for something to hurt that much. Once again I lifted up off the bar and the pain stopped. I now began to scream in frustration and fear. I simply had to stay off the bar but now I knew for sure that that was impossible.
Time Remaining: 6:11:29
I had been on and off the bar many times. My poor calves were now weakened such that once I touched the bar I couldn’t lift up right away. I was forced to stay on the terrible bar and suffer the pain of the shocks until I could will myself to rise up off the bar.
After a particularly long time being shocked I stood on tiptoe and realized that now I had a terrible choice. To let my calves recover I would have to stay on the bar as long as I could stand it. This would also keep the level of the shocks from increasing too fast. I still had six hours to go if I didn’t try something I would be in for some really terrible pain.
I could feel my calves failing once again and I made my mind up to try and stay on the bar as along as I could. Suddenly my entire body was filled with pain radiating out from my nipples and clit. The pain took my breath away. For several long moments I was unable to draw a breath due to the pain but I stayed put enduring the agony. Finally my survival mechanism took over and gasped in a deep breath and began to scream a silent scream. I was shaking uncontrollably as I rode the lightning.
It seemed like an eternity of pain but finally I couldn’t stand any more pain and I lifted my self up off the bar. Bliss. Relief. I stood tightly bound and gagged in heaven. I didn’t even notice the pain of my gag and arms.
After I had recovered my wits I looked at the clock and it had only been about three minutes. I had only stood on the bar enduring fiery agony for three minutes. Only three minutes! Fuck! I wasn’t going to make it.
Come back please back I can’t do this It’s too much this will kill me please please come back get out of this please
Pain. Worse than ever before. I bit down as hard as I could on my gag. I stood on the bar and felt the agony take over my body. All too soon I lifted up once again.
Time Remaining 4:57:58
Now the shocks were at a level that I could not stay standing on for more than a few seconds and my calves were cramping all the time whether I was on the bar or not. My poor calves were completely drained and had no strength left.
For what seemed to me the last time my calves failed and I sank down onto the shock bar. My body went stiff. I shook violently nearly convulsing. My breath came in short little gasps. My eyes were clamped tightly shut. Sweat covered my naked body. I was unable to lift up off the bar. I just stood there helpless to do anything but suffer the horrific pain of electrocution.
My mind was a total blank, thought was impossible. I was totally defeated I had no choice but to simply give over to the pain and just accepted it as what was happening to me. My body was drained and I just stood limp held up by my cruel bondage. And then it happened…
I felt a separation of myself from my body, a sort of a mind snapping of the fingers like the first time you see that psychology image of the young woman with the fur and she turns into the old hag right before your eyes. A complete reversal of understanding. What was a moment ago was the most intense agony I could imagine was now something foreign, to be scrutinized and experienced simply as input that my body felt. It was if I had left my body and I was a scientist watching an experiment. I could feel the nuances of pain as it coursed through me. I had no fear or need for the pain to end, lessen or change in any way. It was merely a curiosity.
I have no idea how long I was in this state, as time did not exist for me. I simply was and the pain simply was. We interacted together and strangers on a bus, aware of one another but just sharing space and time. I would examine the pain coming from my clitoris. It seemed to me as if a thick needle that was infinitely long and heated red hot, was being forever pushed directly into my clitoris and at the same time was being vibrated at an incredible speed. The pain in my nipples was razor sharp and at the same time pounding like a thick sledgehammer. I found it very interesting.
I was aware of how much I was suffering but I also was watching my suffering and I felt sorry for my suffering self that didn’t understand that the pain in my body was only an input to my brain. I tried to explain to my body that it was up to my mind how to interpret it and that it should just relax and flow with the pain. Without time all of these thoughts and sensations happened all at once, it was a kind of peacefulness I guess might be called nirvana. I had no idea; I simply watched and felt the sensations in my body.
My body was covered in sweat. My body was motionless except for the rapid tight convulsing. My breathing was shallow but very rapid. My jaw was a dull thick pain that throbbed in time with my shaking. My arms and shoulders were numb. The unending pain that coursed through my clit and nipples was overwhelming to the other agonies my body was suffering. As I watched I could delve into each individual pain and move in and out of it, feeling its nuances as would caress a lover’s body.
My mind at the same time I was making love to my pain was free to feel the freedom of pure thought without emotion. Without judgment, fear, need or want. I was free, I was rescued. The way out was the way in.
Time Remaining: 1:03:05
I watched as Mr. Carson came in to check on me, I hadn’t moved in hours. He took my pulse, 72 beats per minute, a very normal resting heart rate. He did look very puzzled; he knew it should be much higher or not at all under the conditions. He also took my blood pressure while I remained motionless and seemingly unaware of his presence. 120/80 Normal as well.
“What the hell?” Under his breath he said “Ok Ms. Thompson, I’ll see you in an hour.” And he left me to suffer shaking his head in confusion.
I was not unaware of his presence I was just unconcerned, I almost felt he was intruding. With him gone I was now free to explore the depths and nuances of my pain without interruption.
Time Remaining: 0:00:00
Mr. Carson once again entered my cell and said “Time’s up Ms. Thompson.”
I was startled and annoyed at his interruption. I mumbled into my gag for him to go away but of course I was unintelligible.
Once he turned the electricity off I began to scream and struggle wildly. I had been thrust back into my body. I knew I needed the pain to feel alive again. Without the pain I felt a kind of death. Like a junkie without his drugs.
“I am working as fast as I can Ms. Thompson. You can rest very soon.” He said with understand and actual compassion. But freedom was not what I was asking for, I wanted more pain.
The second the rope holding me upright was released I collapsed to the floor. My body was totally drained. Mr. Carson removed my gag and all of the restraints and carried me to my mattress.
Once I the gag was removed I begged him to put me back. “Pleeeeeebb dieb me bag up! Pleeeb oo ave do dieb be bag ub…”
“It’s ok, rest now. You gave me a scare for the last hour or so Ms. Thompson but I am sure you will be fine to continue your sentence tomorrow. Rest well.” He left again shaking his head in confusion
As I lay there feeling lost, wondering what I could do to get that feeling of painful bliss back it occurred to me, I needed to keep breaking the rules and get more days added to my sentence. Yes! That’s it, just keep breaking the rules and get more days. Once I knew I would be soon be at peace I slept like a baby and dreamed of new torments.