Willpower

by SuziC

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© Copyright 2014 - SuziC - Used by permission

Storycodes: M/f; drug; bond; cuffs; chain; gag; tease; nipple; naked; bdsm; toys; mast; sex; climax; reluct/cons; X

I looked down at my waistline and sighed. It was the hardest thing in the world for me to keep even a reasonably good figure. I was always thinking about how I could get away with eating what I shouldn’t. Lately I had even taken to sneaking food when my partner Alex wasn’t looking. Only small things like a piece of bread with thick butter on or a handful of peanuts which I had said were just for him.

He had no trouble keeping slim, he could eat what he liked but part of that was his demanding job of being a self-employed gardener. He was always doing hard physical work, bending, stretching and struggling. I tried not to moan about my lack of willpower but I did. Alex always replied that I just wasn’t serious, that I could do it if I wanted and that I wasn’t too badly overweight anyway. Standing at 5’6” I weighed 10 stone. I felt heavy though and went about miserably whenever it came to summer.

This summer Alex had managed to wangle a job in Somerset looking after 4 acres for two months. His regulars were pissed but he promised he would come back to our home in Hertfordshire once a month and stay two days to just do the bare minimum. I was pleased that the job was on a remote estate, it meant I could sunbathe without anyone seeing me. However I still complained, sighed and tutted every time I looked at myself in the mirror.

Finally the time came to leave and I packed everything while Alex finished up some last minute mowing for a woman he had been going to for years. He arrived sweaty and tired but insisted on putting our luggage in the van himself before he had a shower. The journey was uneventful except when I ate a burger at the motorway services, then felt awful for doing it and was quiet for nearly an hour.

The estate was beautiful and we were introduced to the owners by the gardener who was going off on a once in a lifetime holiday to Australia. We were shown our cottage, a short drive from the house, surrounded by a huge Yew hedge offering the privacy I wanted. The workload was quite light mainly because Alex had the help of one other guy called Mark.

We carried in our luggage after we were told he only had to work the morning the next day. It would be nice to be with him in such a peaceful place. I noticed a bag I hadn’t remembered packing and Alex quickly took it away.

‘Your birthday surprise.’ He said.

‘But my birthday isn’t till August when we get back?’

‘Ah well I didn’t want it lying around our house to get stolen did I?’

‘Oh.’

I forgot about it while I unpacked and had a little walk around the garden. It was lovely but there wasn’t an awful lot to do apart from sunbathe and eat. That night, after a meal I cooked on the ancient cooker from all the stuff we bought, Alex began kissing me.

‘Can’t you wait for bed?’ I asked trying to pull my top back down.

‘No and I know why you don’t want me to see you.’

‘Oh yeah, why?’ I said suddenly annoyed.

‘Because you have too much fat on you.’

I was stunned, Alex normally never made hurtful comments, tears formed and I held my mouth in a thin line unwilling to answer him.

‘Good. Now you know what I really think. I am sick to death of telling you that you look Ok when I know you need to lose weight. Face it you want to lose it too.’

I still didn’t answer.

Alex looked so different as he stood in front of me looking down at me from his 6’1”.

‘Come with me.’ he demanded.

He grabbed my arm so hard I was sure it would leave a bruise and I yelped in surprise. In the bedroom I had put everything away neatly and even stowed the ‘birthday present’ under the bed so I wouldn’t be tempted. Now Alex dragged it out and unzipped the small black holdall. He tipped the contents onto the bed and my mouth fell open in horror. Lying on the bed were two pairs of black leather handcuffs, one a size bigger than the other. An inch wide leather collar with a lock dangling from it and several strong looking padlocks.

‘You bought me bondage stuff for my birthday!!’I said shocked.

‘I bought you some willpower.’ He answered smiling.

I wasn’t smiling, I had always thought people using stuff like that were sick. I looked down at the waist belt with its large circular lock, the silky black bags and the coils of silvery chain.

‘How is that will power?’ I scoffed and began to walk from the room, ‘If this is a joke it’s a crappy one.’

Alex didn’t answer but he didn’t come out of the bedroom either. I was annoyed that he would hurt my arm and mad at his idea but in the end like just like my food cravings I had to satisfy my curiosity.

It was dark in the bedroom, the light had gone quite quickly, the big hedges saw to that. As I walked into the room I saw that Alex had gone to bed. There were no things on the bed so I guessed he had just given up and was now sulking. He must have thought that here away from the thin walls in our flat was a good place to start this new fad. No such luck. I wasn’t having any of it. Wearing my knee length nightie I padded to the loo and back and then settled down to sleep confident in my victory over his perversity.

The first thing I heard in the morning was a kettle whistling, I couldn’t believe people still had kettles that you had to put on the gas. The birds were singing loudly as I started to stretch.

I couldn’t!!

‘Alex!’ I screamed, feeling my breath restricted by a tight grip round my waist. ‘No!’

Alex came in smiling.

‘Hello sweetheart, you slept well because I spiked your water. I know you like to have a drink before you go to sleep.’

‘But… Alex please! How could you! I don’t want you to do this.’

‘Penny, do you trust me?’

‘Yes but…’

‘No but’s. I want you to do as I say. If you do I can give you rewards. If not I will punish you.’

‘Punish me. You wouldn’t dare.’

‘Oh yes I would.’ I looked at him, he was excited. It was obvious by his boxer shorts tented out at the front. Surely he wouldn’t make me have sex like this. Reaching out with one sinewy arm he dragged the covers off me. I gasped as I looked at myself.

My ankles were wearing the cuffs with a short chain between, my waist was pinched in and the flab stuck out at the bottom making me cringe, I closed my eyes.

‘Look at yourself.’

I didn’t until I felt a sharp sting.

‘What... ouch!’

Alex stood over me with a little black whip, like a cat-o-nine tails.

‘Now look.’ I did after first glowering at him.

‘See what work we have to do. This has to go and it will before you get to your birthday.’

‘Oh come on, you can’t be serious.’ I struggled with the cuffs behind my back but I guessed they were locked just as the belt and ankle cuffs were. ‘You can’t do this.’

‘You’re wrong Pen, we are here for two months and I’ve already told people you are looking forward to not being disturbed to do your writing.’

‘No, please Alex, you can’t keep me like this for two months.’

He smiled and I shivered.

‘Here have some hot tea. Careful now, it’s all you get till my tea break.’

‘But what if I need the bathroom!’

‘I’ll take you before I leave and I advise you to use the time.’

‘In front of you, come on!’

‘You have plenty of times before, willingly, when we were hurrying to get ready to go out.’

‘That’s different.’

‘Sorry Pen that’s your choice. Come drink your tea, I don’t want to be late.’

I turned my head away from him and smothered a sob into the pillow. ‘Fuck off.’ I muttered.

Another sharp sting snapped at my thigh and I cried out.

‘I don’t care if you don’t drink but you will get up and use the bathroom. I don’t want any mess to clear up when I get back.’

He tugged at my elbow and made me swing my legs onto the floor.

‘How can I walk like this?’

‘Slowly.’

I took tiny steps and made it to the loo. As I was naked I didn’t need my hands to pull down my pants and just sat awkwardly on the cold wooden seat.

‘Now you get busy while I get dressed. Then sit on the bidet and I will come wash you.’

I pouted but was relieved when he shut the door on me.

The bathroom was amazingly old but large and well equipped with a shower separate from the bath and a bidet of all things. I was soon done and with some difficulty I managed to press the lever to flush. I shuffled over to the bidet and nearly fell when I underestimated its height when trying to sit down. My squeal alerted Alex who came quickly. He smiled and gently washed me. He rinsed me off and then let the water rise in the basin until I was sitting in lovely warm water. He started to run his fingers over my pussy lips. I looked down but catching sight of my belly I looked away again, my excitement snuffed out. Alex looked up at me and I could see he knew what I was thinking.

After he dried me and led me back to bed he said he had left a straw in the tea if I changed my mind.

‘Don’t leave me here.’ I begged but he told me it was for my own good and walking out locked the door behind him.

The room was in a soft light from the thick net curtains and after nearly an hour, by our travel clock, I gave up trying to release myself. I was hot and exhausted. I cried a little and then fell asleep.

Alex coming home woke me and I heard the door unlock. I thought perhaps he would take pity on me if I begged again but he ignored me completely until I finally said I loved him.

‘I’m glad, I love you too. See you later.’

‘No!’ I screamed at the door as he locked it again.

My stomach started to growl at twelve and I hopped to the window to see if I could see Alex coming. I was starving. He didn’t come and at 1pm I began to panic. What if he’d had an accident, someone would come to find me, oh God.

At 1.45 he arrived smelling slightly of beer.

‘Sorry darling, I had to have a drink with Mark. We had a big pie each, I said you were just having a salad so there was no need for me to rush home.’

‘Are you planning to starve me to death, you bastard?’ I spat.

‘Do you want something to eat? Because if you do you’d better be nice to me.’

‘Please.’

‘Ok. Come in the kitchen I need to change things around.’

He was very careful to use some chain on my waist belt first securing me to the chair. Then he locked my ankles to the chair legs. Finally he released my hands and I could have them free to eat. He gave me a big plate of salad and some melon after. There was none of the cheese I normally ate, no bread, which meant no butter of course and I didn’t feel full at all.

‘I can’t go all afternoon on that.’

‘You won’t be. That’s for the whole day.’

‘No. I’ll die!’

‘Don’t be stupid Penny, you won’t die. That was more than enough to sustain you.’

‘But…’

‘Don’t bother me about food anymore. You can talk about something else but not food.’

He touched the whip he had put on the table out of my reach and I closed my mouth. I was quiet while I watched him eat a slice of apple cake big enough for both of us.

When he took me back to the bedroom he fixed my wrists to my sides using D rings on the waist belt so I would be more comfortable. I lay on the bed feeling miserable. I felt his weight beside me when he came back from the shower then I felt his hand on my breast. I looked over and he was staring at me.

‘You were a good girl at dinner. I think you deserve a reward.’

He flicked my nipple and I moaned. I asked if he was going to untie me.

‘No, not until I am sure you won’t disobey me.’

‘Oh Alex, what are you doing.’

His fingers were driving me mad and slowly they moved down and caressed the wide leather belt.

‘Soon this won’t be so tight.’ He said lightly kissing my wrists that were pinned to my sides. When he kissed my inner thighs I tried to stretch my hands to touch him but the padlocks weren’t giving and I moaned again.

He sat up and reaching under the bed he brought out one of the small black silky bags. My heart hammered but he had said I was to get a reward. He brought out a small leather case and opened it to reveal something about 4 or 5 inches long. It looked like a tuning fork. He told me it had cost him a small fortune but that it was my birthday gift. He showed me how it charged from a computer USB port and then switched it on. I could hardly see the vibrations and it was really quiet. I realised then what its shape was for. The tingles were tiny and I squirmed in order to keep in contact with it, my knees were apart, but my ankles together. Alex laughed quietly making me feel cheap but I was past caring as my hips bucked in a huge orgasm. The restraints somehow added to the feeling although I would have died rather than admit it.

I felt the wetness as Alex slid his fingers into me.

‘Jesus Penny, you’re so wet.’ He kissed me then and rolled me over so he could enter me from behind. He lifted my hips as I was unable and I knelt waiting until I felt at last his cock edge its way into me. He filled me and pulled out again over and over driving me mad. I was unsteady and relied on him to hold me. He used the waist belt and tucked his fingers under it, pulling me even closer to him. His pace quickened until he came with a hoarse cry.

We lay with Alex behind me on our sides until my hands were uncomfortable. I began to wriggle about until I had to lie on my back.

‘Alex…’ I began.

‘No.’

‘Oh come on this has gone far enough.’ I was getting mad. All the euphoria from my wonderful orgasm had gone and I was just fed up and really hungry.

Restrained as I was I did the only thing I could. I pinched his leg, hard, digging my nails in. He cried out and sat up.

‘Well you can forget having your hands free anytime soon. I had a routine worked out for you and I was thinking about being lenient but not now.’

He was really angry and looking at him I could see he meant it. I cursed myself for being so stupid, I should have waited until I had his trust then I could have made a move. He silently pulled me up off the bed and along to the bathroom where he left me and locked the door on me.

I did what I could and even managed to turn on the bidet dropping the plug carefully into place. I sat in the warm water and wondered what he would have done in the morning if I had continued to feel sexy. The thought made me warm again. I tried to move my hands to touch myself but I could reach no more than a couple of inches in either direction. I huffed sitting in the water until Alex came to dry me off. He held my arm roughly and steered me to the bed. When I saw the chains I stopped until he prodded me.

‘You’ll be comfortable here. I’m taking the sofa, it looks good enough.’

‘Please I’m sorry.’

I cried quietly while he attached my wrists to the headboard. I could reach my water glass and the jug but I looked at it suspiciously after the night before. My ankles were locked close together and to the footboard by a couple of feet of chain, meaning I could draw my legs up a little bit. When I got no reply to my pleading I grew silent and closed my eyes when he covered me with a soft quilt.

‘Sleep well.’ He said and locked the door on me.

I slept well but I wondered if it was to do with drinking the water from the jug or whether I was just exhausted.

I was taken to the bathroom without a word spoken. I knew what I had to do. As I struggled I noticed I had a bit more mobility in my hands.  When I came out it was to a table filled with food. All healthy worst luck. There was dry wholemeal toast with no jam just Marmite. Porridge which I hated and a selection of fruit which I had bought thinking at the time it would be Alex eating it. There was no butter, no milky coffee or chocolate, just black coffee and tea.

I ate all I could but missed the tasty treat of salty butter and my milky coffee.

‘Penny I will trust you to be in the lounge today with the TV but I expect you to do some work this afternoon.’

‘What do you mean, I can’t go out like this!’

‘Oh yes you will. I will take you out after lunch and if you do what I tell you, you will get a meal this evening. If you don’t I have a punishment for you.’

I was terrified at the thought of being anywhere but safe within the walls of the cottage and spent the whole morning unable to concentrate on anything. The TV showed drivel anyway but I could not get to my lap-top in the other room. I had a chain just long enough to do a few steps before it pulled on my waist. It was attached to the leg of the biggest heaviest display case I had ever seen. It was solid wood and seemed to be screwed to the wall. I had no chance unless I had a hacksaw. I searched all the drawers I could reach but there was nothing remotely capable of sawing through the shining chrome chain.

I only knew the time when I bothered to watch the TV and soon it was twelve thirty and suddenly Alex came into the room looking hot and happy to see me on the sofa.

We ate a salad each, with no melon this time. He said he was going out after work to get a take-away and that if I behaved I would get something. I swallowed my irritation at the way he spoke to me and drank as much water as I could to fill me up. Something I would regret later.

With my hands locked again to my sides closely I stood watching in the back doorway as Alex unloaded something from the van. It looked like stacks and stacks of pots. He took them to the tiny kitchen garden at the back which was slightly overgrown with tangled creepers up the rickety fences. He spread out a blue plastic sheet and then got out a huge bucket and filled it with the hose. He walked past me and got two brushes from under the kitchen sink and then took my arm. I resisted until I couldn’t keep my balance any more.

He talked to me while he fiddled about behind me, I gasped when he brought two lengths of the chain between my legs, he pulled the chains through a D ring there at my front and then explained he was expecting me to have finished cleaning the pots by the time he came home. I didn’t bother resisting when he locked my wrists to the ends of the chain.

‘What if someone comes?’ I whined.

‘Then hide. I’ll leave the chain long enough so you can get in the shed.’

I looked at the shed which looked as if it would collapse at any time and shuddered.

‘Have fun.’ he said as he disappeared inside and I heard the door click as he turned the key.

He came back round after locking the front door and got in the van and drove away without even looking at me again.

I stood feeling like an animal left outside. I looked down at my ankles and saw he had made the chain about a foot across which made walking easier. However I couldn’t get out of the garden. I wouldn’t have anyway and he knew that, I couldn’t bear for anyone to see me like this, trussed up.

I sat down on the plastic sheet and went to pick up a pot. The action brought the chain between my legs tight and I gasped. I had to shuffle really close to everything to avoid cutting myself in two. Idiot he had left it too short. All the movements I made were transferred to my pussy. Soon I found myself doing the same rhythmic cleaning of a single pot which was already clean. I shook myself out of the sexual stupor and was horrified to see how far the sun had moved round and how many pots were still to do. I got up on my knees which eased the pressure a little and worked hard until there were only two stacks left.

I thought I had a little time to chance feeling that nice feeling again and sat down stretching my legs out. The sun was full on me now and getting hot. I thought how strange my tan marks were going to look with the thick leather belt and cuffs. I then lay down and enjoyed the sun for just a little while. It took my hunger away as well to think about sex. I wriggled my wrists feeling the chains pulling at my tender nub. Soon they were slippery from my juices and I writhed on the wet plastic until I came in a sweaty climax, crying out, careless of anyone who may overhear me.

I lay on my back for a while until the shade touched my body and I started. I had to finish the pots or else get no food.

I was sore from the chain now and it was hard to finish without causing myself pain. I started to feel like I needed to pee as well which added to my frantic cleaning. I had to finish before I tried to find somewhere to go. In the end I could stand it no more and walked with small steps until I was off the plastic sheeting. I looked desperately to see if there was anywhere I could go privately but there was no chance, I just had to go where I was.

I crouched and let the stream pass. I nearly died of shock when I heard a vehicle. I hurriedly finished and was trying to rush back to the plastic when Alex stepped out of the van and caught me.

‘Not finished.’ He said staring at me.

‘P...Please Alex. I had to pee. I would have been finished.’

I watched as his expression changed and he chuckled. He walked over to me and kissed me.

‘I didn’t expect you to finish them all sweetheart. It’s OK.’

I cried as he took me in his arms, I was shaky with nerves at being exposed all afternoon.

‘Come on, let’s go get you cleaned up.’

We showered together, me free of my cuffs at last but I had a collar locked on and the chain from it locked onto the exposed water pipe. He was so loving and washed and dried me carefully. I sighed and didn’t complain once about not being free. He left me naked in the warm bathroom and got dressed. He came back in holding his van keys.

‘They have a Chinese take-away in the village. Do you want to stay there or be in the bedroom?’

‘I don’t know.’

‘Well stay there I won’t be long.’ And with that he left me.

I had my hands free all the while I was in the bathroom so I didn’t mind so much. I could just sit on the edge of the bath and sat with my hands between my legs. I was helpless without Alex. He had so easily made a slave of me. I could have called out in the garden but I doubt anyone would have heard me anyway. The big house was too far away and all that was around were just fields and pockets of forest.

My nipples hardened as I thought how I had pleasured myself in the sunlit garden. I wondered if Alex could tell. Hopefully he thought it was just the sun making me flushed. I gently touched myself again and then stopped suddenly. If I got excited now he would know for sure. My mind was even more excited by my trying to stop myself. By the time I heard the key in the door all I could think about was having him inside me. I was sopping wet and couldn’t hide it.

‘I got you something to eat but I have to set up your chair first. And you have to promise not to fight me.’

‘Ok, Ok I promise. I’m hungry.’

I was starving after working hard all afternoon on a salad.

He came to get me after a few minutes and I smelt the food as he unlocked my chain from the pipe and led me to the kitchen. He had closed the curtains making it dim and had a candle on the table but when I saw the chair he wanted me to sit on I hesitated. Not because I had to wear my cuffs again but because suckered onto the smooth plastic was a dildo, it was at least six inches long and thick. 

Only an ‘Oh.’ Escaped my lips.

‘I want you to think about something other than food when you sit at the table.’

I thought about how I had been so angry at Alex to begin with. A day ago I would not have even let him lead me from the shower but now as I stood looking at the shiny pink veined dildo I knew I wouldn’t need any lubrication. He was surprised how easily I slid into my chair and I sat gently biting my lip until my bottom was touching the cold seat. I let Alex click the locks to hold my wrists into the cuffs and I felt a shiver of excitement as he locked on the ankle cuffs.

‘Are you going to feed me?’ I asked, looking at all the dishes laid out.

‘No you can reach.’

‘But I can only get to the rice.’

‘Yes that’s the plan.’

I sighed heavily as my stomach grumbled. I reached to the table edge and when I leant down I could feed myself. It was awkward and every time I leant down I felt the dildo move within me. I was getting more and more heated as I ate and soon finished what I had been given. I sat back unable to wipe my mouth or reach a drink of the beer he had put out for himself. He apologised and came out with a glass of water and a straw so I could just lean down to drink. Again the movement made me horny and I couldn’t resist a wriggle.

‘Getting comfy?’ Alex asked, glancing my way.

‘What am I supposed to do?’ I answered moodily.

‘Do you want more?’

‘Food?’ I asked hopefully.

‘No, not food.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘This.’

He took a remote control out of his pocket and set it on the table.

‘No!’

‘No what? No you don’t want me to turn it on? Or no you don’t want it.’

There was a look I had never seen before on Alex’s face and I felt a little nervous for the first time. I really did have no choice in any of this. The thought made me move my hips some more and I licked my lips unconsciously. I was beginning to like this.

‘Since you haven’t answered me I have no choice. I need to see if I’ve spent my hard earned money on something worth my while watching.’

He took a napkin and wiped his face and sat back with his beer. Stifling a burp he reached for the remote and looked closely at it. He pressed the button without looking at me and I cried out.

‘Hmm… maybe something a bit less violent.’ I watched as he turned down the dial and pressed it again.

This time a small vibration tickled me and I tried to press against it. He slowly turned the dial until I was begging for him to let me come. He turned it down again and left me while he got up and put away some leftovers and washed up.

‘This will be your job tomorrow but if I catch you having eaten anything you won’t enjoy your evening.’

All through his chores I moaned and asked him to turn it up or off, finally as he started to dry up he turned round sharply and told me to shut up. I shouted then calling him several filthy names.

He walked out angry, when he returned I knew he’d bought something with him. All I saw was a flash of black leather as he came from behind me and forced a wad of leather into my mouth. He buckled it and went back to his wiping up. After the first dish he returned to the table and reaching down he switched the remote to full. I screamed into the gag when I finally came and slumped down as Alex turned off the dildo. Now I knew what reward was like and I fell asleep instantly after being secured to the old bed.

I was given no task the next day as Alex had another half day but I was told to do some cleaning. He said he would spend his tea break with Mark who sounded like a really nice man.

When he left me I had a long chain from my neck which dangled behind me tickling my bottom and still had on my waist chain and wrist cuffs. The cuffs were joined to my waist by about two feet of chain each so I was able to perform most tasks. The waist belt was attached to the dresser like before but with a much longer chain allowing me to get to the kitchen, bathroom and lounge but not as far as the door or the spare room where he’d told me he was keeping my lap-top.

I did what I could just to help the morning pass. I finished and lay on the bed for a while wriggling about to find the most comfortable position. The nagging hunger only disappeared when I thought about what reward I might get if I didn’t eat anything from the kitchen. Thinking about food I began to wonder if I could manage to fool Alex by taking something he wouldn’t notice. I thought a long time before I looked at the clock, it was ten thirty. I had at least an hour to think of something.

I stood in the kitchen and opened the old yellowed fridge. I shivered at the cold air coming from it, realising I had been naked for three days now. The leftover Chinese was there in its foil containers. What if I took just a tiny amount from each container, I was sure he wouldn’t notice that.

Feeling horribly guilty I make sure I put the containers back exactly as they were and closed the fridge. He wouldn’t know I was certain, I hadn’t taken any prawns as he might have counted them, I just had a few strands of noodles and some vegetables. My stomach still growled loudly and I felt worse as I took a long drink of water.

At twelve thirty Alex was back and looked around at the gleaming surfaces as I sat at the kitchen table waiting for him with a big glass of water.

‘You didn’t say I couldn’t drink water.’ I said defensively, trying to throw him off the scent.

‘Of course you can drink water.’ He smiled. ‘I’m so pleased you are taking this seriously.’

I felt a pang of guilt and when he kissed me I put my all into it.

He pulled away and looking grim he took my hands from his waist and walked out of the room.

‘What, Alex, what is it?’

I took a deep breath racking my brains for anything I didn’t do then it dawned on me. My breath! I had eaten a very spicy sauce, he must have tasted it. Oh why didn’t I clean my teeth? How could I be so stupid?

‘Come here.’ He shouted from the bedroom and rising on shaky legs I went through the door. He told me to lie down on the bed.

‘You are addicted to food, there is no reason for it, you have been tested and it’s not a medical problem Penny. It’s willpower.’ He spoke as he re-locked my hands wide apart to the headboard and my legs likewise, leaving me open for whatever he had in mind. ‘For God’s sake Penny, you only need to lose a stone by eating healthier, why can’t you manage it on your own?’

I lay my nerves on edge wondering what he was going to do, whip me I thought.

‘I didn’t want to have to use this but you will have to wear it for a while as your punishment.’ He pointed to a hood.

He knew I was hardly able to hold my breath long enough to jump into a swimming pool, how did he think I would manage wearing a leather hood with no holes for breathing.

‘No, oh No. This is not legal, you can’t make me wear that, you’ll suffocate me.’

‘I can and I will.’ He held up the masklike hood and I panicked. I thrashed about while he lifted up my head and brought the mask against my face, he pulled it down over my head and settled it into place, as he did I felt my air come back through two tiny holes beneath my nose. I still screamed for all I was worth but I could hardly hear myself as he laced the hood tight behind my head. I was scared when my world was black and I soon had to concentrate on breathing to stop myself getting lightheaded.

‘I will leave you now to think about what you did. I’m going out to eat. I’m going to throw the rest of the Chinese away, I don’t want it now you’ve poked around in it. You won’t need anything else to eat today as you stole food already.’

I tried to scream out, I didn’t want to be left, what if I choked. I vaguely heard the door slam but the hood cut out all the sound of his quiet engine. I cried a little but stopped myself when my nose became stuffy. I pulled uselessly at my wrist cuffs and swore then finally became still. All the exertion had made me hungry again. I lay limp and wished I hadn’t bothered, I could have been enjoying a salad. Alex let me eat as much as I wanted of all the salad stuff. I salivated at the thought of the melon I had seen in the fridge.

It felt like hours as I lay quietly, occasionally trying to pull my legs together when suddenly I felt a warm hand on my thigh. I screamed thinking a burglar was in the house until I heard Alex speak.

‘You weren’t alone baby, I wouldn’t be that stupid, I don’t want you to be hurt. I love you.’

He began to kiss me and I struggled to breathe as I felt him getting closer to my pussy which had instantly become warm. I felt his weight as he sat on the bed and then a tingling caught me unaware. He was using the little vibrator on my nipples. I moaned into the hot leather surrounding my face. Slowly he moved it down my body until I was raising my hips begging him to touch my clitoris with it. He didn’t and I then felt his hands unlacing the hood. My hair was stuck to me as I had sweated in my fear and frustration he gently brushed it back and gave a sad smile.

‘You know I didn’t have to look at the camera to see you had cheated on me. I smelt it on your breath.’

‘Camera?’

‘A tiny camera I set up while you slept last night. I hoped you wouldn’t cheat but you did.’

‘I’m sorry.’ I closed my eyes. I was sexually frustrated, hungry and contrite.

‘You don’t get to come today at all and I meant it about food too.’ He began to change my position as he spoke. ‘Back to how you were the first day but you may watch TV with me.’

‘I’m sorry.’ I said again as he led me to the lounge.

‘Perhaps you can do better tomorrow.’

‘Yes, yes I will.’ I promised.

The following weeks I did everything I was told and our sex life got better and better. I was always thinking about sex when Alex came home. He’d had to take my belt in by three notches already and I was feeling and sleeping better than I had in ages. He bought several little jobs home for me, he told me stories about him and Mark, then one day he suggested we go out together.

‘You’ll have to wear something long sleeved unless you don’t mind showing your tan lines.’

I was so pleased I went to the wardrobe to look and see what I had. I had plenty of clothes that covered me up because I was used to hiding my fat form, now as I held them up to me I realised how much weight I had already lost. Alex came to stand behind me then produced the keys to my cuffs. He took my wrists and removed the cuffs for the first time in a month and I felt cold and strangely light without them.

‘Get dressed then, we go in half an hour.’ He kissed me and was gone. I still wore the tight belt so chose a long top and some leggings with an elastic waist which still clung to me although they were loose.

The evening was wonderful, Mark was very complimentary and I blushed often. He was blond and good looking but not as handsome as Alex to me. My tall dark man was now my master as well as my lover and all I wanted was to please him. Modestly I took my cues from him and when it was time to leave I wasn’t sad to go. All I had drunk was mineral water and I refused the crisps knowing they were no good for me or my new figure. I watched them eat with no trace of hunger or the resentment of when I was first restrained.

I was happy I realised and I could be like this for the rest of my life.

I smiled in the van on the way back and before bed I asked Alex to put my cuffs back on. I missed them and the thing they represented – his total control of me.

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18.07.14